How do you rebuild trust?
Someone asked, how do you rebuild trust? We’re not talking any major breech such as an affair or having a secret Swiss bank account. But in general, when we as singles have suitcases full of past baggage that we bring right on into the next relationship… how do we trust the next time?
Well… we just choose to. I don’t think there’s any way around that.
I had a hard time trusting in a relationship, only because of past issues with another person. I figured out that she was really never going to be able to prove to me that she was trustworthy in the way I was expecting. I almost expected her to slip up somehow and show me some deep secret that would prove how dumb I would be to trust her!
After a few pointless arguments that got me nowhere, I started a new strategy. When I’d have those doubts creep up I’d stop right there and think, “Am I going to trust her or not?” And I took that leap every time. Or, it prompted me to ask for clarification from her, or express my concerns logically or something. Funny, I haven’t thought about it in a while, because the trust is so there now.
Trust is a choice, and it is learned. Keep at it and it will come! I think that’s what they mean when they say, “Love like you’ve never been hurt.”
September 28th, 2007 by: Steve
- Posted in Advice
